the old’s in
March 31
I was told that my confidence level is the strength that makes me, me. The conviction and speech that I’m able to produce is just, strong enough to push my point right out and up.
Latest headline: It’s no longer the same.
Cold-feet. Dependence. Lose control of situation, of myself. Emotionally driven. Worse, the very scary paranoia is back.
So which is me? The ever-strong lady. Or the timid kid who’s so afraid of taking the next step. Being ambitious, over ambitious doesn’t help either. At times, I try to figure what the hell was I thinking getting involve in all these load. But, it always comes back to square one. Passion. Satisfaction of the adrenaline rush. And meeting new people. The work load will get out of hand, 150% sure of that. And that’s when I require help. In terms of sharing of load and even listening. So, this is when the next problem arises. How long am I suppose to be depending on people? They to have their life to lead, problems to solve and enough issues at hand to handle.
“Somehow, I had known that if I needed to be rescued, I was going to have to do it myself.”
ps. You have to talk. How are people to understand if you don’t give them a chance to listen. Give me this chance. I trusted you with my stories, complains and problems. I am standing by you , always (just like how you swear you will for me). You know that don’t you. Could you ever trust me? Maybe not the way I do, but at the very least the minimum trust of sharing with me your issues. I’m here. I’m going no where my dear.
for: pm only
If there’s so much I must be, can I still just be me, the way I am? Can I trust in my own heart? Or am I just one part of some big plan?
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